Episode 93

Chapter 2 of the Winter's Heart Saga

Part IV

Previously: Honestly, those pants look fine on you. Yes, really! Of course I'd tell you if they didn't. All right, so last time Corvath tried to convince his nephew Hans-Raoul to help him stop the Ice Witch, and explained how he had imprisoned her in the Winter's Heart all those years ago, which in retrospect seems like bad idea since now she's really, really powerful, and kind of pissed off. Hans-Raoul declined to help, since he had other things on his mind, like his secretary Robyn Cheung turning into a demon, and his own plans for destroying the world. You know, typical middle management stuff. Meanwhile, La Witch, now occupying the body of cat-burglar/florist Sally Kettle, took a turn around her new ice palace-fortress-whatever-you'd-call-it, decided she needed some henchmen, and helped herself to the frozen Adrian Room's book of spells. Ah... the blue top, I think. Why can't you wear the shoes you like with it? Oh, well the black one then. Anyway, back in the Hydrogen Cave -- no, really, the black one will be fine, I just said the blue one because I like blue. Of course you shouldn't wear it if it means you'll have to wear the "shoes of death", as you call them. Yes, the black one is good. In the Hydrogen Cave, shortly after having their asses handed to them by Li'l Ms. Freezie-Pops, the bulk of the League of Heroes (local 441) sat around saying what a serious situation it was, when who should pop in but the Diatomic Duo's old buddy N, no doubt to deliver some kind of plot-advancing exposition. I don't write it, baby, I just narrate. Yeah, well, I did ask, but "Avalon & Company" already has a narrator. What I'd really like is a web-comic, you know, it's light but steady work, and much higher exposure. Meanwhile, Robyn Cheung found herself at the side of the road in the middle of nowhere with a wrecked car and several corpses. Then the demon took over again, and she vanished. That's it.

Oh, hey. You look great. Really!

Although it would be exaggerating to say that it was commonplace for N, Mage Extraordinaire, to pop into the Hydrogen Cave and deliver some unwieldy bit of exposition, it is truly unusual for His Sarcastic Eminence to do so in front of such a large audience. To wit, all but two of the League of Heroes (local 441). Roll call!

• Hydrogen Guy and Deuterium Boy, the original Diatomic Duo, looking annoyed but resigned;
• Helium Girl, whose expression of bewilderment isn't that different from other non-shopping related occasions;
• Galactic Customs' Finest Chuck War, who is barely restraining himself from throttling the interloper for his 'prank' a few moments earlier;
• Gen X Man, the Plaid Flannel Avenger, wondering who the suit harshing the collective buzz is;
• eco-vigilante the Rainbow Warrior, looking like a baby seal vowing pay-back;
• and finally, spectral rail rider SuperConductor, wishing once again he'd just stuck to accounting.

Hydrogen Guy
Okay, N, say what you need to say and make it quick. We have a major crisis brewing that doesn't involve you.

N
More of a crisis than you know, and I sincerely wish it did involve me. Not that it would do you very much good.

Gen X Man
Is this going to be long? I don't think I really have the attention span for anything long. Especially without jump edits and CG effects.

Rainbow Warrior
People like you make me weep into my pillow at night.

Deuterium Boy
Guys, cut the cross talk. Mr. Omnipotence has the floor.

N smiled and bowed.

N
Thank you, David. Now, gentlemen -- and Gen X Man --

Helium Girl & Gen X Man
Hey!

N
-- to say the reappearance of the Winter's Heart has caused a stir back in the Manifold would be like... oh, what's an appropriate metaphor... calling your Second World War a bit of a contretemps.

Gen X Man
That's a simile.

Hydrogen Guy
I wasn't going to say anything.

Gen X Man
I was an English major for a few semesters.

Helium Girl
Shh!

N
Thank you. When I slipped out -- they think I just went for doughnuts, so this needs to be fast -- the Manifold was embroiled in a debate -- well, a clash of egos, mostly -- between those who feel direct intervention is called for, and those who think we should just quarantine the problem until it goes away. Neither of these options would be desirable from your point of view. If the Mages stepped in directly, although we would ultimately win, your planet and much of this corner of the galaxy would likely be lost.

Chuck War
What?!

N
'Collateral damage' is the expression, I believe. We're godlike, yes, but our ways are not subtle. Quarantine, on the other hand, would involve permanently sealing your entire Solar system away in an empty pocket of space. Much less trouble for us, you understand, but not for you. The Winter's Heart would be stopped in its tracks, but not before this preposterous "Ice Witch" of yours had finished ravaging your planet.

SuperConductor
And so either way, your callous arrogance dooms the Earth!

N
Who writes your dialogue, T. Campbell? You have to understand, any individual seed-world - even yours, the only one even close to being successful - matters less to most Mages than Z's pet rodent. And no, I'm not referring to Deuterium Boy this time. If you knew that one of the rats living under the basement had rabies, you wouldn't hesitate one millisecond before you called the exterminator, would you? Because that's how far above you we are, developmentally speaking. I've seen a few Chesterians - sorry, Terrans - who might be able to cut it as low level Mages, but that's like saying you've found a monkey you think you might be able to house train.

Chuck War
So first we're rats, now we're monkeys to you?

Hydrogen Guy
At least our status is improving.

Rainbow Warrior
How can you claim to be so advanced when you spout the same Victorian Darwinian nonsense that greater complexity implies superiority? It's exactly that short-sighted egotism that's led to the abuse and exploitation of Earth's non-human species, not to mention the impression of indigenous cultures by colonial --

N
I agree with you completely. [pause] Oh, what, I can't be a sarcastic asshole all the time, can I?

Hydrogen Guy
No, it's just you're agreeing with Gene.

Rainbow Warrior
Yeah! Hey, what do you mean --

Helium Girl
Shhh!

N
Helium Girl, you really are a wonderful audience... As I was about to say, Z and a few of his colleagues feel that that sort of arrogance is exactly what caused this problem in the first place. They're stalling the debates as much as possible in order to give you lot time to deal with the situation in your own way.

Chuck War
How long?

N
I can't estimate. Days, most likely. Time doesn't flow in the Manifold like it does here. But then, you've never heard a filibuster until you've heard one of Z's speeches.

Hydrogen Guy
This just keeps getting worse, doesn't it? So why are the Mages so worked up about the Winter's Heart, anyway?

Helium Girl
Yah, like, what can some magic rock do against you guys?

N
My dear Yolanda, the Winter's Heart is practically the ultimate magic rock. Prick your ears, friends, for what follows is the True Secret History^TM of the Winter's Heart.

Gen X Man
I don't think I can prick my ears, but I've won a couple bar bets by wiggling them.

N
Good enough.

Eons ago, as you know, the Galaxy was spanned by a human empire - we called it the Republic, though its actual democratic content was questionable. The highly caste-oriented society was dominated by the Mages, a natural philosopher class whose understanding of all the usual details - matter, thought, energy, space and time, etc - gave them nearly unlimited power.

Originally, the Mages themselves protected the Republic and maintained order, but as time went on the task became both too much for their numbers, and distasteful to those whose wish to retreat from society was growing. Ultimately, they decided to delegate.

Eventually they created the Elemental castes - warrior-scientists with genetically engineered powers over specific chemical elements. They served exactly as the Mages hoped, bravely and loyally, to the end of the Republic and beyond. The Elementals came to embody the ideals of the Republic itself. Their fall was the Republic's fall, and their re-emergence promises a New Hope --

"You know, if you keep going, you'll have to pay royalties to George Lucas."

Lucas is an incompetent hack. Sorry, I was waxing eloquent.

Anywise, the point of all this background is, the Elementals were not the Mages' first attempt at creating super-powered 'delegates'. Their first concept was to create a powerful artefact, strictly under their own control, from which the delegates could draw their powers. It would bestow limited Elemental-like powers over all forms of matter and energy...

"So now you're ripping off the Green Lantern Corps?"

Look, you try coming up with a galactic back-story that sounds completely original.

The Mages pooled their powers and created a "proof of concept" artefact. Something to show to the funding committee, that kind of thing. It was the most complex device they had ever constructed, indistinguishable on the molecular level from crystalline carbon, although the "carbon atoms" were nothing of the sort. However, it had a handful of serious, ah, misfeatures, you might call them.

"Deadline pressures, huh?"

"They probably figured they could patch it later and call it a 'critical update'."

"Ohmygod, the Republic was run by Microsoft!"

If I may continue? The first bug was a flaw in the procedures to circumvent the laws of thermodynamics. This limited control over Elemental fields to low temperatures, and enhanced control over some thermal parameters such as heat flow and temperature. The second bug was that the artefact was, in a certain sense, sentient. This wasn't entirely a surprise, since intense concentrations of what you charmingly call "magic" often achieve a rudimentary self-awareness.

The third bug was that the artefact, or should I say, entity, that you now call the Winter's Heart, was evil to its very core. This came as a rude and tragic shock to the Mages, and Republic society as a whole, whose supreme mastery over the laws of nature had led them to view concepts of good and evil as purely relative social concepts. That an evil entity could exist entirely apart from human morality was inconceivable to them.

The artefact was given to a mundane but exemplary member of the Republic's military for testing, and it entirely consumed him. Scores of planets died before he was stopped. Even the Mages had begun to fear the cold by the end of it.

What happened next, frankly, not even I really understand. The Mages tried to salvage the project, perhaps still unwilling to believe they were capable of failure. After a few more incidents which fortunately caused more alarm than actual death, the Republic government took the extraordinary step of censuring the Mages, shutting down the project and confiscating the artefact. What happened to it remained a mystery until the fall of the Republic, making it probably the best kept secret in human galactic history. The Republic found that they could not destroy the artefact without the Mages' co-operation. So they shunted it off to a series of insignificant mud-balls, hoping no one would ever find it. (Why they didn't simply throw it into the nearest black hole, I don't know. Maybe they were afraid what it would do to the fabric of space-time.) In later years a secret Elemental guard was assigned to it. Earth was the last "safe world", and the guard apparently stayed right until the very end, even training some of the local apes to look after it in case they disappeared. Which, two million years ago, they did.

And now, just like all problems you don't solve when they're relatively small, it's come back to bite us in the ass.

Hydrogen Guy
You mean it's come back to bite us in the ass, don't you.

N
I was being polite.

Deuterium Boy
You lot made this thing way back when, can't you just unmake it?

N
Well, not without a fight... and that's exactly what the interventionists are arguing for. And, much as it's against our nature to say so, we Mages aren't what we once were. We've been dull and inactive for two million years, so much has been forgotten. The Winter's Heart was made by the best Mages of their time, at the top of their game. We can subdue it, even destroy it, but to simply unmake it is beyond us now. Your only hope in that sense lies in the Vallene.

Hydrogen Guy
Hans-Raoul? You're joking. Not the guy you're always saying is the biggest threat we've ever seen?

N
Possibly downgraded to second biggest. No, I don't mean him. I mean Corvath, his uncle. He's here now, and he stopped this Ice Witch from possessing the device before. It's possible he could be convinced to unmake it now.

Hydrogen Guy shakes his head.

Hydrogen Guy
There's got to be another way. I don't want to have to depend on creatures like that. Or you, for that matter.

N
No offense taken, HG.

Hydrogen Guy
Suit yourself.

Chuck War
I agree with Hydrogen Guy. Does this Winter's Heart have any weaknesses? A susceptibility to heat maybe?

N
Its powers are reduced by high temperature, but its very capable of lowering any human-bearable temperature. Your best tactic would be to destroy the physical form of the "Ice Witch". It won't be easy, mind you, but it is vastly more vulnerable than the artefact itself. But for all intents and purposes, the Winter's Heart is indestructible.

A silence fell over the Cave.

N
Well! I'd really love to stay for a drink, but I have to run. The rest of the Manifold will be wondering what happened to their doughnuts. Remember, children, time is short. Z and I can't stall the Manifold forever, and if you can't stop the Winter's Heart, they will. Bonne chance, mes amis.

He vanished in a burst of white light. The ominous pall hung on over the Hydrogen Cave.

Deuterium Boy
Well...

Hydrogen Guy
Yeah.

Deuterium Boy
Who wants Scotch?

The Ice Witch lowered Adrian Room's tattered book of spells and tilted her head to one side, evaluating the creature who had appeared before her.

Ice Witch
Hm. Well, you're not really what I expected. On the other hand, the last one looked very impressive, and all it wanted to do was redecorate.

The small blonde woman who sounded a bit like Julie Andrews and claimed to be the dark incarnation of winter's power, regarded the tall Chinese woman in rumpled sweats who claimed to be an otherworldly demon.

Robyn Cheung
Why have I been summoned?

Robyn did not sound at all like herself. But then again, neither did Sally Kettle.

Ice Witch
What are you called, demon?

Robyn Cheung
R... Azoni. I am Azoni of the Sear.

Ice Witch
Hm... I'm a little rusty on my demonology, but that would make you... Dark Seraph of Rahu? No, my apologies, that was Azhi the Clear... Azoni of the Sear, yes, Aybabtu's Claw of Discord, wasn't it? I know titles are very important to you creatures.

Robyn Cheung/Azoni
Aybabtu is no more.

Ice Witch
Well, these things happen, I suppose. What are you doing in mortal form, Sear Maiden?

Robyn Cheung/Azoni
This mortal agreed to bear me to Earth as the price of release from Aybabtu's Realm. I am bound to this form until the Vallene Hans-Raoul is slain.

Ice Witch
Oh, I fully understand the inconvenience. It's certainly true what they say, you can choose your friends, but you can't choose your mortal host...

Robyn Cheung/Azoni
Why do you summon me, Enchantress?

Ice Witch
I'm very sorry, the mortal girl that I'm currently possessing has a tendency to prattle, and I'm afraid it's rubbing off on me... I intend to change this world, Azoni. I will remake it into a paradise of ice and snow, over which I shall rule as a Goddess. Oh, I do like the sound of that. However, until I reach my full potential, I will be hampered by the plague of heroes infesting the place. I am called the Ice Witch, and I wield the Winter's Heart.

Robyn Cheung/Azoni
My service carries a price.

Ice Witch
The life of the Vallene Hans-Raoul, I take it? He's yours. But not until the winter solstice. Whatever is currently stopping me from taking full possession of the Winter's Heart's power will be defeated by then, and I won't need you any more. After that, whatever you do won't matter to me.

Robyn Cheung/Azoni
You will bring me the Vallene.

Ice Witch
As you wish. Now - best friends? Oh, do say yes!

Robyn Cheung/Azoni
Azoni will serve you, Ice Witch.

The Ice Witch clapped her hands in imitation glee.

Ice Witch
Wonderful! We'll get along famously! Now...

She turned to look at a large ice-sculpted hourglass off to one side of the hall. A rain of fine ice crystals flowed into the lower bell, which was already three-quarters full.

Ice Witch
... the heroes will be making a new attempt on our palace soon. Be prepared, Azoni. Together we'll show them the true meaning of fire and ice.

Almost 4 hours had passed since the column of energy first appeared from Maple Ridge's Natural History Museum. The temperature now hovered near -30^oC. Clad in whatever winter gear could be dug out of closets and attics, police and SHVD teams from cities around the Lower Mainland had surrounded the Museum, their assault vehicles hastily adapted for blizzard conditions.

The blast of a semi's horn parted the lines in front of the building. An absurdly well-armed truck, a locomotive-sized plough bolted to the front grill, rolled to a stop in their midst.

Two Eskimo-like figures emerge from an SHVD armoured car and make a dash for the War Rig. They climbed up the side, and Chuck War popped the door open and let them in the cab.

Peregrin
Lord Almighty, who left the air conditioner on?

Owen Peregrin, detective with the MRPD, lowered the furred hood of his parka. His prominent nose was red from the cold, making him look like W.C. Fields just before lunch.

Chuck War
All quiet on the northern front, detective?

Peregrin
Aye, War, we've seen neither hide nor teat of the witch for a half hour or more. That's when there seemed to be some large electrical discharge inside. Charles War, let me introduce Special Agent Anthony Willis of the Super Heroes and Villains Department. The poor lad got Parker's case files when he took medical leave, and now this mess is officially his.

Chuck War
Mmm, my condolences.

The young man in the back seat shook hands with Chuck. Man, Chuck thought, you know you're getting old when the SHVD agent is younger than you are. He remembered Luke Gardner saying he'd felt the same way when he first met Parker. Special Agent Parker had been made to take medical leave after a vicious mass of pond scum had taken his arm off. He and his wife decided Hawaii was the perfect place to recuperate. Chuck envied him.

Willis
Nice to meet you, Lieutenant War. It's an honour.

Chuck War
It's Chuck, please. The demotion still stings.

He smiled, indicating it didn't.

Chuck War
This is your first major incident, Willis?

Willis
Uh, yeah, you could say so. I was on a few metahuman-related cases when I was with Toronto's gangs unit, in the year before I joined SHVD, but nothing on this scale. Owen's been a lot of help.

Chuck War
Just stick with him, and don't let Peterson piss you off too much.

Peregrin
What's the story, Charles, is the League going in?

Chuck War
Five minutes. HG's team is going in through the vents in the east wing, SuperConductor's team is ghost-training into the west wing. I'm here to knock on the front door.

Peregrin
Uh huh. So we're not planning on salvaging the Museum, then.

Chuck War
Hell, worst case scenario? That building won't even be there in five minutes.

Willis
I'll pull our units back.

Chuck War
At least a block.

Peregrin
We know what this bogey wants yet?

Chuck War
[shrugs] Destroy the world. The usual.

Willis
Great. Just wonderful.

Chuck War
The new wrinkle is, if we can't stop her, the Mages will do it for her.

Willis
The Mages? You mean Hydrogen Guy's Mages?

Chuck War
You know the Elementals' back story?

Willis
My honours thesis was on "Prehistoric Superhero Legacies and their Modern Impact on Society".

Chuck War
So you'll understand when I tell you there's an out-of-control ancient Republic artefact behind all of this.

Peregrin
I'm assuming I don't need to know any of this.

Willis
I wish I didn't.

Chuck glanced at his dashboard clock.

Chuck War
I'd better get in position. Start moving your guys back, Willis. I'll hold the League back until they're clear.

Peregrin
Good luck, War.

Chuck War
You too. Stay warm, guys.

A local commuter train burst into the west wing of the ex-Museum, emerging out of a inter-dimensional portal. It slowed to a halt on rails of spectral energy, its doors slid open, and its sole three passengers stepped into the Ice Witch's domain. The doors chimed reassuringly and slid closed, and the train began to accelerate, disappearing into another portal that winked out behind it leaving just a faint whiff of ozone behind.

SuperConductor closed his pocket watch and slipped it into his vest pocket.

SuperConductor
I've never tried that in a building this small before.

Gen X Man
And it worked like a charm.

Suddenly there was a loud explosion somewhere ahead of them. The building shook.

Gen X Man
Aaand that would be Chuck-o, laying down our cover fire.

The Rainbow Warrior stared at the ice walls around them.

Rainbow Warrior
Would you look at this... it's like stepping inside an ancient glacier. It's so... organic. It's beautiful.

SuperConductor
This building was a repository for man's knowledge of the natural world. We can add vandalism to the list of the Ice Witch's crimes.

Gen X Man
I'm sure that's the one she's really worried about, too. Gene!

Rainbow Warrior
Hm?

Gen X Man
Enough of the Spielburg stuff. The ice is pretty, now let's move on. What's the plan, we just walk up behind her and Terry hits her with a diesel?

SuperConductor
I think stealth is the key. Her attention will be split between Chuck War's frontal assault and the Diatomic Duo. With luck she won't even be expecting us.

Rainbow Warrior
Stealth, ha!

He drops into a crouch.

Rainbow Warrior
My forté. Just follow the enviro-ninja!

Gen X Man rolled his eyes. The building vibrated again; this time the source seemed to be behind them. Gen X Man glanced back, and froze.

Gen X Man
Ahh... Gene? How's the enviro-ninja against ice dinosaurs?

The foyer reeled as a second volley from the War Rig slammed into the front doors. Cracks tore the thick ice reinforcements. The Ice Witch scowled; her gaze flickered over the damaged wall and the cracks mended themselves. The ice on the wall thickened.

Azoni hovered nearby, her body suspended a meter or so off the ground in a crackling red electrical envelope.

Azoni
I await your orders.

Ice Witch
They are not the Al Ma'tal. They aren't important. Destroy them quickly, then deal with our distraction. The Al Ma'tal I will deal with myself.

Azoni nodded. The envelope surrounding her enveloped her completely, turning her into a winged creature of pure energy; then the energy seemed to collapse in itself, and she was gone.

The Ice Witch smiled.

Ice Witch
Nice exit.

Hydrogen Guy
I'm not sure I like what she's done with the place.

Deuterium Boy
Well, not all evil entities have decorating savvy.

Helium Girl
I dunno, I kind of like it. In a sort of, like, Viking hell kind of way.

Hydrogen Guy
I'm sure that's what she was going for. Still, would it kill her to put a fern in the corner or something? Actually, if it would, that's something I'd be interested in knowing.

Deuterium Boy
Sure, a cold-villain whose weakness is ferns.

Hydrogen Guy
I guess the other way around would make a lot more sense. A fern-villain whose weakness was cold, I mean.

Helium Girl
Didn't we, like, just have one of those?

Deuterium Boy
No, that was algae, remember?

Helium Girl
It seems like months ago.

Deuterium Boy
Just a few days, actually. Ah, the magic of Internet time.

Hydrogen Guy
Shh, fourth wall... I understand completely, though, Helium Girl. Time really does drag between new episodes of 'Buffy'.

Helium Girl
Totally.

They had 'de-gassed' in the east wing of the Natural History Museum according to plan. Upon materialising, they drew their swords and spread out, walking cautiously towards the centre where sounds of Chuck's plasma cannons came from.

Helium Girl
Like, I don't know, she's already whipped our asses once, do you, like, really think these swords are going to do any good?

Hydrogen Guy
I don't know about you, but I need something to hold onto, and its either this or a pacifier.

Helium Girl
If I was in a better mood, I'd have, like, a whole bunch of funny suggestions.

Deuterium Boy
Easy for you, HG. At least the Ruler is slightly effective against the Ice Witch. I don't know what I can do with a few inches of steel.

Helium Girl
Again, like, so many possibilities, wasted.

Hydrogen Guy
Well, I take it you're feeling a little better, anyway... hello, what's this...?

He poked his head into one of the side rooms - the original display room for the Winter's Heart. The ice-encased forms of Adrian Room and two police officers still stood where they froze. Hydrogen Guy entered the room cautiously, scanning it for possible traps. The others followed as he curiously examined the fortyish, scholarly-looking man in the wizard's hat. Deuterium Boy, meanwhile, produced his pocket Scan-O-Matic^TM and was running it over the three figures.

Hydrogen Guy
Bet you a hundred bucks this is the guy who started all our problems.

Deuterium Boy
No thanks.

Hydrogen Guy
Sure? I really need the money. Helium Girl?

Helium Girl
As if.

Deuterium Boy indicated the two policemen.

Deuterium Boy
These two are cold on the infrared scanner. It's impossible to tell how long they've been dead. That guy you're looking at, though, is still registering as a normal human heat source, albeit one teetering on hypothermia. It must be that 'Living Ice' stuff she used before.

Helium Girl shivered.

Helium Girl
That is, like, totally not a pleasant experience.

Ice Witch
I promise you won't have to go through it again.

She appeared at the door. The heroes swung around to meet her. She glanced at Deuterium Boy's Scan-O-Matic^TM and it shattered in his hands like hot plate thrust into ice water.

Deuterium Boy
That was just petty.

Ice Witch
All I want is for you to notice me, hero.

Hydrogen Guy
Consider yourself noticed. Now how about packing in the light show and giving up?

Ice Witch
[sighs] Blue one, you are so tiresome.

The room began to move.

Chuck War eased up on the trigger of the War Rig's forward plasma cannons. The last set of volleys, continuous fire for almost two minutes, should have vaporised not only the ice covering the Museum's face but the Museum's front door and most of the foyer as well.

But aside from rapidly freezing clouds of steam, the Museum's face looked exactly as it had ten minutes ago. Even under continuous fire, the ice was reforming as fast as it was being vaporised.

Chuck War
Dang. I hope they're having better luck inside than I am out here.

An alarm went off on the cab's elephantine instrument panel. Chuck first thought it was the cannons either icing up or melting -- either seemed possible, at this point - but it wasn't the weapons panel. It was the proximity alarm. He glanced at the radar. Something coming in from 500 meters up, heading straight for him.

He looked out the window. A bright red spot was growing just above the Museum's east wing. He hurriedly checked the deluxe Scan-O-Matic^TM. Not a ship, sensors couldn't get a mass reading, it looked like some kind of massive electrical discharge...

A massive electrical discharge with wings and talons.

Chuck swore and dived for the turret controls. He didn't even have time to pray the shielding held.

Heroes under Fire! Will Chuck War survive the onslaught of a ticked off she-demon? Will the League of Heroes (local 441) B-team end up as ice dino chow? And can the Diatomic Duo and the Covalent Blonde defeat the Ice Witch at last?

Find out in the Conclusion of the Conclusion of...

Same Hydrogen Time, Same Hydrogen Website!